garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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