I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
