that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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