Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
try to milk me bitch
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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