she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
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