i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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