Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
