so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
