He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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