she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
stop calling my apartment porn island.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
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