Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
