Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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