What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
