I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
My dick has a subreddit
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
