you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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