I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
