I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
