HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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