we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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