i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
