I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
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