My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I got inside last night via doggy door
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
