Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I miss vodka workout Fridays
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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