Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
