Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
