Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
