Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Randomize
