Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
