At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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