Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
