Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
We need to get me chipped asap
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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