I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize