I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
