with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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