new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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