I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
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hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
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She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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