i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
You were trust falling into bushes
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
