Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
