i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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