Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
