shes about as inviting as chlamydia
i think i have two assholes
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
