Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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