I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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