I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
