I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
