he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Randomize