clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Randomize
