I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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