its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
