Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I hope mine doesn't look like that
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I understand Curling. That high.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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