I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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